What Does It Mean To Be In "Recovery"? [The Sober Truth]

I’m going to say something that will likely upset some people…
I don’t like the word R E C O V E R Y. I am not saying that my opinion is how it should be for everyone, but I am saying that is not for me.
Recovery means you return to a normal state of health, mind, and strength. But you don’t stay there. You have recovered. This is the word I use.

Recovery, to me, means you’re staying in the same place. You aren’t hurt but you are not better. When people continually state that they’re in recovery, even years after the incident, that reinforces the brain, body, and everyone around them, that is not better. They don’t feel they are healed. And I can’t wrap my brain around that.

I have healed.

I am better.

That doesn’t mean I go back to the thing that hurt me. That just means I healed from the pain but I know it still has the ability to hurt me again. If I tore my ACL playing Flag Football. I would have surgery. I would go to recovery. I would go to physical therapy and then I would be healed, to the best my body can heal. My body would be different but I am better, my body changed but it’s not broken now. I was released with restrictions.

If I decided to go back to Flag Football, I take the risk to injure myself again if I am not careful. I know my knee is susceptible to a repeat occurrence. Based on that knowledge, I would likely stay away from that activity and try something else. But I wouldn’t continue to tell people 3 years later I am still in recovery. You don’t forget the pain but you are no longer in pain.

I created Purposely Sober for people to recognize that they have healed or want to heal from the negative effects of alcohol. That they recognize that it was not serving them. It was hurting them in most cases. They abused it and it abused them. They do not want to live with shame or fear for the rest of their lives. They have made the choice to deliberately stay away from that which broke them. They also know that even though they are different now, they are no longer broken. They healed. They won’t go back to what hurt them, just like I wouldn’t go back to what broke my body. I would find a new thing to do. I would move on. I would find new things to do
and find happiness in other activities.

I recognize everyone is different. But this theory is what works for me and the people I work with. We replace old habits with new ones. We work on being the best we can be with our new bodies that have healed. It scares a lot of people to think they will forever be in recovery or broken, I want to change that mentality.